Toad News
by Red Witch
Summary: Pietro doesn't feel well so the gang thinks up an idea to cheer him up.


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This just in…I don't own X-Men Evolution characters! This is a little fic I thought up while waiting for "Mindgames." I am also using this opportunity to tell you that I think I am almost ready to send out the first part of that crossover I have been working on since last summer! Aggghhh! Just give me a few more weeks, I'd like to at least get the first chunk of it done because it's a looooong one! Probably about 30+ chapters. It's full of humor, adventure, a little romance and a lot of angst! It will be out sooner or later…I promise…In the meantime, there's this bit of nonsense.

**Toad News**

"I told you not to eat all those green hamburgers yesterday," Todd shook his head at Pietro who was moaning in agony in the bathroom. "Even Freddy wouldn't touch them!" 

"Oh shut up Toad," Pietro groaned. "I'd like to spend my last few hours on Earth in peace!" 

"You ain't dying you lunatic," Lance rolled his eyes. "It was only green because of the food dye. Of course, I'm not so sure that's the real reason the buns were green."

"Ohhhhhhh," Pietro moaned. "I'm gonna die."

"You are not gonna die," Tabitha sighed. "You better stay home today."

"You think?" Todd arched an eyebrow. 

"No! Don't leave me!" Pietro gasped. "I don't wanna die alone!"

"For the last time Pietro you are not going to die," Lance rolled his eyes. "But we are gonna be late! Come on guys!" 

"How could you guys abandon me in my hour of need?" Pietro whined as they took off.

"Easy we have a jeep," Todd said as he walked out the front door. 

Later that afternoon the gang found Pietro on the couch in the living room. He was still in his pajamas and covered with a blanket. "IT'S ABOUT TIME!" He shouted. 

"Well he's better," Todd smiled. 

"What kept you?" He whined. "School was over hours ago!" 

"We made you something," Todd took out a videotape from his backpack. "It was my idea!" 

"Let's just say we had a little project that came into our minds," Lance smirked as he put in the tape and turned on the VCR.

The tape started to play. On screen came a picture of Todd and Tabitha at a desk wearing sport jackets. 

"This is the Toad News Network," Todd smiled on screen. "All Toad news all the time! Top story today! Daniels gets in trouble again!" 

"What?" Pietro perked up. "Where did you guys do this?" He watched a picture of Evan skateboarding.

"School's got an editing room set up in one of the classes," Lance smiled. "Now watch this!" He pointed as Evan's skateboard slipped in something. He fell over another table, scattering the students' lunches. 

"YES!" Pietro cheered. "This made my day! How did you make him slip?"

"How did he slip?" The onscreen Todd spoke. "Well apparently there was some unusual slimy substance in his path."

"Did you put it there?" The onscreen Tabitha asked.

"Maybe?" Onscreen Todd smiled. "So what happened to Daniels? We go now to our roving reporter Lance Alvers. Over to you Lance!" 

The scene cut to Lance in a sport jacket. "This is Lance Alvers reporting live. Let's listen in as Toad News gets the exclusive on Evan Daniels." The scene then cut to a shot of Kelly's office via the window, where Kelly was tearing into Daniels. 

"Mr. Daniels," Kelly said. "This is the fifth time this semester I have caught you causing a disturbance on school grounds. Apparently you didn't listen to last week's announcements stating that skateboards are banned on school premises!"

"Oh this is classic!" Pietro howled with glee. "Look at him squirm! Look at him squirm! I could watch this all day!" 

However the camera quickly turned on to something else. As Kelly rambled on, the camera focused on someone walking outside and sitting under a tree. It was Kitty. 

"Let me guess," Pietro said. "Lance edited this thing right?" 

"Bingo," Todd sighed. Lance turned red and sank slowly in his seat. "Let's fast forward this shall we?" The next scene was Kitty at her locker. "LANCE!" 

"I couldn't help myself," Lance muttered weakly. 

The onscreen Lance was now interviewing Kitty. She was giggling and blushing. "So Kitty tell us about yourself?"

"NO!" Pietro shouted. "Fast forward!"

"Yeah the last thing we want to see is her views on makeup!" Tabitha snapped.

"We did not talk about makeup!" Lance snapped back. The others glared at him. "We did talk about stuffed animals for a bit…" He muttered. 

Back to Todd and Tabitha in the studio. "Brilliant report Lance," Todd grinned.

"Yeah brilliant," Todd grumbled, folding his arms.

"And now the Weather with Blob!" There was Fred in front of a map. 

"Here we see the happy sun over Bayville!" Onscreen Fred put a huge sun with a smiley face on the map. Unfortunately he put it on the wrong state.

"Fred you got it on Maine!" Todd's voice could be heard off camera. 

"Sorry," Fred moved it again.

"That's New Hampshire!" Todd grumbled. 

"Well which one is New York?" Fred grumbled.

"This one!" Todd came on camera and put it there. Then he stomped back off camera. 

"Well don't get like that!" Fred shouted. "It's all your fault we had to do this anyway Toad! If you and Lance didn't…" Then the scene cut to Fred smiling. "And now a look for tonight's weather!" 

"What?" Pietro asked. "What was he talking about?" 

"Never mind," Todd waved him off. "Here's my favorite part."

"Tonight there will be a full moon," Fred's voice came up. There was a shot of Duncan tied to a flagpole with his pants around his ankles. 

"And that's all the news there is!" The onscreen Toad spoke. "Good night!" Then the scene changed to the cafeteria. Lance and Todd were onscreen. 

"Hey this is a neat camera!" Fred's voice could be heard.

"Will you stop playing with that and help us with this?" Todd snapped.

There was a scene with Todd putting something in a huge pile of hamburgers. "You sure all those laxatives will work Toad?" Lance asked. "I don't even think Pietro will eat all those burgers." 

"Hey you wanted to get back at him for TP'in your jeep again!" Todd said. "It'll work. Believe me. All you gotta do is challenge him to eat these burgers."

"Uh oh…" Lance grew pale. Pietro grew red.

"La-ance," Todd shot him a look. 

"I forgot about that part," Lance gulped. "Sorry Toad!" 

"So what's this green stuff you put in the burgers and bread?" Lance onscreen asked. "Food dye?"

"Just a bit of slime," Todd onscreen said proudly. 

"WHAT?" Pietro shot out of the couch. "I'm gonna kill you guys!" 

Fred grabbed him. Pietro kept kicking and trying to reach Todd. "LET ME AT HIM!" Pietro shouted. "LET ME AT HIM!"

"Well I think our patient has made a speedy recovery!" Fred laughed.

"Uh I think we should go take a nice run now Toad," Lance ran off. 

"Just give us a head start before you guys let him loose!" Todd hopped away. 


End file.
